My wife has known the Lord for 19 years. She has studied her bible, and supported me in ministry in many various ways. She has a great gift of hospitality and a servant heart.
The cry of my heart has been that we could enjoy studying together on a deeper level. I would try and read to her what I was getting all revvvved up over such as Jonathan Edwards, John Owen, John Piper, etc...
For nineteen years I have hoped for her to taste on a deeper level the goodness of studying and enjoying the Lord of the Word! I have been at peace with God about her walk, but hoping to share in a common passion about the awesome truths of the "doctrines of grace".
A few weeks ago she said "I want more. I want more joy. I want to know God better. I want to have more of the Holy Spirit." Now you must understand that we have been around all the different circles and camps of believers. Now let me digress here for a couple of paragraphs.
I was saved in a locker room in the postal service by a group of mixed up people that read God's word together. Yes, I was born again, saved, redeemed, at that mixed up group of every type of believer. We even had a guy from THE WAY! Yet God saw fit to save me with the gospel, and my sins were forgiven, and I was a new person in Christ Jesus. Then I went to a liberal church, a Wesleyan Seminary, and a Pentecostal Bible Study. However, my wife and I over the years have learned as a result of this path set out for us to not be swayed by another's experience, while at the same time not to take someone's theology without confidence that it is truly in accord with God's word.
We're not liberal, but rather challenged the pastors at our first "church" to come clean with the congregation and tell them what they truly believe. Then when I went to a Wesleyan seminary I didn't even know much about Calvin or Arminius, but I argued with everyone that they were not being honest with the Bible. I couldn't get past any of God's clear "election". So I learned best in the current of Arminianism to study my bible and see for myself. God is so good!
Then we attended the Pentecostal Bible Study, and we were told to just "start babbling" and the gift will come." We tried it! No speaking in tongues. Then we tried to teach the Bible to that study concerning the gifts. They kicked us out! I continued my schooling, graduated, and then I heard Dr. John Piper preach at a C&MA General Council. He pulled my theology together with the Word preached. I read and studied the doctrines of grace, the puritans, and the whole gang.
I am currently a pastor in the C&MA, and yes I am a full blooded, passonate lover of the doctrines of grace, for they have truly brought me to worship God in new and great measure.
So then, what is this all about concerning my wife and the Holy Spirit? She has been reading Lloyd Jones "Joy Unspeakable", and I have been reading Owen's "Communion With God".
What have we been learning? That there truly is far more of the fellowship of the Holy Spirit that is available to us. We are now praying for each other, and trusting God in His Sovereignty and timing to do as He pleases. But the very best of all of this has been that my wife and I together are seeking more of God together in His word, and through wonderful authors as well.
Are you having a concern about your spouse's walk with God? Love her, show her Christ, and trust God that in a week, a month, a year, or maybe 19 years like my situation, God will prove Himself faithful!